What happens when you’ve been in a relationship long term and the fire goes out in the bedroom? Some look to improve their sex life by pursuing an affair. But this only causes further pain and heartache.
There is no single, immediate solution. Relationships are complex and problems require tackling together.
There are numerous reasons why the spark may have gone out. There are so many commitments on our time – work, family, social. There’s barely enough quality time to spend with your partner and when there is, you can be too tired to even take advantage of the situation.
You probably know all the moves to get in the mood, but how do you get into the bedroom with the right frame of mind? That can take preparation prior to climbing under the sheets.
Follow these tips and you’ll be on track to bringing back some passion into your life:
1. Take notice
When does you sweetie feel most amorous? Do they let you know or do they wait for you? What turns them on? What doesn’t? Think about when the best time and way may be to imitate things.
2. Find time
You will need to make time for your partner. Put the Blackberry down! Create time and space for the two of you to relax together, whether it’s a romantic weekend away or a date night without the kids at home.
3. Communicate
If you are operating in separate orbits, never having quality time together, then you won’t be communicating well, if at all! Find time to talk about your day, your lives and interests. Discussing finances or the weather don’t count.
4. Be healthy
You’ve heard it all before – get enough sleep, eat healthy foods, drink water and exercise. It really does make a difference!
5. Be positive
It can be easy to slip into blaming. But nothing will improve your sex life if you are brooding in the corner alone. See tip #3! Take care of yourself both physically and emotionally and you’ll be in a better place to be a loving partner and to tackle sensitive issues about what’s happening in the bedroom.
Take your time and think about how you can approach the issue. And take care of yourself. It’s the first step to feeling sexually confident again and ready for some bedroom gymnastics.
Good luck!
