- ISBN13: 9780684854625
- Condition: NEW
- Notes: Brand New from Publisher. No Remainder Mark.
Product Description
How do you tell your partner that you’d like to be spanked?
Where can you find a good dominatrix?
If your husband like to wear your panties, does that mean he’s gay?
What really goes on at SM clubs?
Afte… More >>
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
While there were several sections of the book that were quite good (such as Transgenderism, descriptions of Dominants/submissives, Bondage, and a good resources section), there were several chapters that seemed to cover the same topics that other books for SM novices have already covered. While these are important topics to cover, it seems the author made these topics a bit too simplistic. In the first half of the book, I found my mind wandering often.
The second half of the book (where most of the above information is located) was better. However, Gloria’s mention of “Old Guard” practices is slightly off. There never was one true Old Guard (possibly variations on it), and she makes it seem as if there was.
I also noticed in the Resource section that no mention is made of the book SM101 by Jay Wiseman, which IMO is also an excellent introductory SM book.
Rating: 3 / 5
From Skin Two magazine: “Gloria Brame is to heterosexual kinky sex what Pat Califia has been to the lesbian equivalent. She has an admirable talent for explaining the hows and whys of kink and promoting it as a perfectly acceptable alternative to vanilla, demystifying it without destroying its thrill. Although aimed at the ‘mainstream reader’, this excellent book will provide a thought-provoking, informative and entertaining read for the experienced player. It covers the basic kinks–bondage, transgenderism, fetishism, SM, DS etc–plus some you might not have heard of. There’s advice on things like play party etiquette and how to attract a femdom, along with discussion of thorny problems like dealing with hostile partners and how to punish a masochist. Brame’s authoritative writing is backed by sound knowledge of the science and psychology behind the things kinky people get up to (she has a PhD in Human Sexuality) and enlivened by her wicked sense of humour. Buy this book as a gift for someone, but make sure you read it first yourself!” SKIN TWO, Summer issue 32, page 24.
Rating: 5 / 5
And that intended audience is the average person who may have heard the term kinky, seen something kinky in the mass media, or show partner as asked him/her to do something kinky. The language is clear and simple for the most part and Brame’s tone is one of understanding. Most of the chapters are organized well and there is no attempt made to tell someone who to do different activities — that is rightly left to more specific guides. However, just as with “Different Loving”, this book is in serious need of citations and evidence for many many statements which are made — so a word of caution to not just blinding believe what you read. Another very odd problem is the “kinky reading list” which does not included many very well written books from Greenery Press and yet includes far more advanced books (such as “Beneath the Skins” and “Leatherfolk”) that beginners really do not need to read until they are far more experienced and grounded.
Rating: 4 / 5
This book helped me finally realize and admit to myself that I’m kinky. The way I grew up, the notion of being kinky was foreign and frightening, yet at heart I was kinky from childhood. That meant decades of not feeling good about myself and much unhappiness. This book helped change my thinking and did so in an entertaining and non-threatening way. Dr. Brame provides very practical information and asks non-judgmental, open-ended questions. In answering them, the light finally went on for me. This was a watershed book that was easy to read and entertaining, and as another reviewer noted, I too read it cover to cover. If you’re curious about kink and sexuality, I highly recommend this book.
Rating: 5 / 5
Brame’s “Come Hither” is really for those who are looking to either spice up their love life or those who are turned off by the average BDSM books and organizations. However, Brame does suggest that you getinvolved and do more reading — an excellent piece of advice since the bibliography and recommended books she lists leave a good deal out and “common sense” is rarely a great guide to life, especially sex. In 13 chapters she does a good job of looking at several issues and behaviors that one may want to try that fall into the BDSM umbrella. As I find frustrately common in non-fiction sexuality books, there is a lack of correct citations.
Rating: 4 / 5