- ISBN13: 9781572243767
- Condition: NEW
- Notes: Brand New from Publisher. No Remainder Mark.
Product Description
Some people use sex to medicate their feelings and/or cope with stress much in the same way as others would use alcohol or drugs. Lack of sexual self-control can manfest in the form of excessive use of porn sites, phone … More >>
The Sex Addiction Workbook: Proven Strategies to Help You Regain Control of Your Life
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
Key strategy/ work to FINISH THINGS! Addicts do not finish things,ENDING THINGS (what things?) adds substantially to recovery. They prefer to “keep options open.” Thrives in unfinished business. Starting more than you can finish leads to CRISIS. Addicts avoid completing their conversations; Important feelings and facts are not communicated. Conflict not resolved. PAIN ACCUMULATES. Increase PAIN AND COST TO STOP. Childhood needed something(the addict) didn’t receive- trust, security, safety, non-sexual affection, both parents together. Normalcy. (Need trust mot to worry, to simply live life normally) RESPONSIBILITY TO THOSE YOU HAVE HURT. NEGATIVE EMOTIONS ARE TRANSFERRED TO CHILDREN. Addictive sex feels shameful, illicit, stolen, exploitive, and joyless. Healthy sex = adds to self-esteem, is mutual, intimate, fun, and playful. Fighting (disagreeing)= act of trust- focus on issues. – Give outcome to God. Horniness = loneliness. When in doubt, don’t have sex. Secrets will separate you from others in recovery. Get a pet to have healthy touching needs met. Avoid the feeling that you are a victim (having control over your body, thoughts, opinions, and feelings that you Think someone in authority wouldn’t approve of you having. You have to answer only to yourself. Be gentle w/ yourself about old tortuous conflicts. They are not about you! They never were! You are safe with your thoughts. They are yours. Recovery = burst of creativity, brings awareness of abuse. NURTURING- Learning how to care for themselves and to allow others to care for them IS an essential RECOVERY TASK. Intimacy= shared enjoyable experiences! FIDELITY TO YOURSELF is the ultimate act of faithfulness to the other. Trust yourself. It’s as hard for your partner as it is for you! Admit mistakes. Share Spirituality. Have fun together= common experiences. Sustain from sex w/o intimacy. Talk before, during, and after sex. Compliment your partner. Respect boundaries. Pay attention to feelings. See Sex as a legitimate joy! Take care of your body. Express attraction. Work on friendship and companionship. Fast-forward the realtionship.
Rating: 3 / 5
I felt that this book was very simplistic in its explanations and its exercises. That’s not to say that sometimes the simple exercises aren’t the hardest, but rather I could’ve and really have thought of these things before. It also was completely centered on the male experience of sex addiction. All of the case stories were about men and most of the examples of behaviors/thinking were very male oriented (ex. going to strip clubs, hiring prostitutes, thinking that women want to be dominated) and completely ignored the particular way that women experience sex addiction. Resources that I’ve found to be more powerful and insightful: the basic text for SLAA (Sex & Love Addicts Anonymous) and “Women, Sex, & Addiction” by Charlotte Kasl. This last text is the only one I’ve ever seen that adequately deals with the female experience.
Rating: 2 / 5
Interesting and informative book for those working with clients and or patients that have sexual addictions. However, this book could have been improved by having a section or a chapter regarding Family Counseling and or Therapy for service providers working with individuals with sexual addictions.
Nestor R. Mantilla
Rating: 4 / 5
Great tool for discovering your level of addiction and great exercises to help you reach a solution. Life-changing. Highly recommended.
Rating: 5 / 5
This workbook is practical and empirically supported. Its exercises are clear and cognitively based and includes a survey to measure the degree of sex addiction. I use it in my work with patients in psychotherapy.
Rating: 4 / 5